Wardrobe Malfunction
I have mentioned before that I don't pay for parking. My Ethiopian parking attendant's name is Abdul El-Hajj Muhammad Muhammad, which means There is no God but God and I am the prophet of this parking lot.
He always saves me one of the six best spots in the lot. Did I mention that this is downtown where there is absolutely no parking?
I can leave for a meeting and come back later in the day and my spot will still be there. One time, he gave my space away. He gave me his own parking space and swore to Allah that he would never make such a mistake again. He also begged me to scratch out his eyes, but I coyly declined.
Abdul El-Hajj Muhammad Muhammad is a nice man, but not much of a conversationalist. We mostly talk about the weather in Addis Abba. Today was different.
I pulled into the lot and up to his little booth. I waved and smiled. He jumped out of the booth and talked to me for 15 minutes about the following:
- Coffee (Ethiopian)
- Coffee (Starbucks/Ethiopian)
- Food (Ethiopian)
- Weather (Ethiopian)
- Weather (Local)
- My parking space (still available)
- Our budding friendship (nine months now)
- How nice I look today (thanks for noticing)
- Coffee (Ethiopian)
I waved again and drove to my space. I reached over to grab my purse (gray, shirred, very cute) and realized in horror that my right breast was exposed.
I could die right now.
I have tiny boobs. Bras are optional. Today I should have opted for one.
I imagine that Abdul El-Hajj Muhammad Muhammad went back in his booth and said, "I have been saving that nice lady a space for nine months and finally she thanks me."
I wonder what size cup I'd have to have to get a covered space.
Mist 1
Posted by Mist1 @ 5:40 AM
21 Comments:
First! (Maybe)
Oh how nice. You made his day! Did you get free parking for it? Then it was worth it, what's a little humiliation between generous friends?
Happy Friday!
jenna,
I thought my personality made his day. I don't want to overestimate the power of A cups.
icl,
Of course I parked for free. Humiliation...it's like second nature to me.
nerd,
In some religions, the right boob is sacred.
Ack, I thought that stuff only happened to me. At least you get free stuff out of it.
Dang it. Didn't make first but I'll keep trying. Interesting that Jenna and I both said the same thing about making his day.
Have a gweat weekend!
veronica,
Nudity loves company.
I should do PR for a nudist colony.
nerd,
I thought I recognized you from Our Lady of Erect Nipples. You sing in the choir, right?
Wonder if this makes Abdul El-Hajj Muhammad Muhammad the Justin Timberlake to your Janet Jackson?
icl,
Keep trying, comment moderation is killing me...but one psycho can ruin it for everyone.
anastasia,
Amen. Slutting out my A's for a parking space!
sabilak,
This is my real nose. My brother is an alien.
curm,
Well played.
Did he mention the "Lion of Judah" or Bob Marley ? :)
paul,
No, but as I left the parking lot yesterday he did say, "Coffee. Tomorrow."
It was sort of like being asked out by Tarzan.
LOLOL Too good.
I used to have little boobs too. LOVED them. Then I got sick, gained some weight, and all of a sudden have these huge things which I cannot stand. Honestly, how do women with boobs bigger than A manage? I can't stand the things.
Thankfully, I've dropped some weight and now my boobs are slowly returning to normal As. I am nearly counting the days to small heaven!!!
See the power you have? All those women getting implants are entirely missing the point. Erm...
mouse,
I feel so empowered. I will now proudly refer to the girls as the A-Team.
pbg,
Jealousy does not flatter him. Can't wait to see the entry.
Today I wore a pink skirt and black underwear. It wasn't until right after I got home from re-negotiating my contract with my boss that I noticed that the skirt was a bit see through. Unfortunately, this didn't really help me get what I wanted.
veronica,
Is this the same innocent looking pink skirt? Perhaps your messsages were too mixed. Next time, you might consider slutting yourself up a bit more.
nice. very nice.
I'm a DD betcha I could get a covered space...however, I could talk about coffee all day...
hmmmmm
pup,
I bet you'd get valet parking. Hell, for DDs they might even send a driver to take you to and from work.
It was, indeed, the same skirt. I think you're right about my mixed messages.
veronica,
Mixed messsages are best when they are strategically planned. Use with care.
Okay, this clearly is the funniest post I have ever read. LOL Heck, if you you were up a cup size, he'd probably become your personal chauffeur...It would be kinda like "Driving Miss Daisy"
darlene,
Thanks. My moments of humiliation are here for your enjoyment.
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