To Do:  1. Get Hobby 2. Floss

Here's what I need to do: 1. Get Hobby, 2. Floss. Blogging just gets in the way.


Friday, July 21, 2006

Wardrobe Malfunction



I have mentioned before that I don't pay for parking. My Ethiopian parking attendant's name is Abdul El-Hajj Muhammad Muhammad, which means There is no God but God and I am the prophet of this parking lot.

He always saves me one of the six best spots in the lot. Did I mention that this is downtown where there is absolutely no parking?

I can leave for a meeting and come back later in the day and my spot will still be there. One time, he gave my space away. He gave me his own parking space and swore to Allah that he would never make such a mistake again. He also begged me to scratch out his eyes, but I coyly declined.

Abdul El-Hajj Muhammad Muhammad is a nice man, but not much of a conversationalist. We mostly talk about the weather in Addis Abba. Today was different.

I pulled into the lot and up to his little booth. I waved and smiled. He jumped out of the booth and talked to me for 15 minutes about the following:

  • Coffee (Ethiopian)
  • Coffee (Starbucks/Ethiopian)
  • Food (Ethiopian)
  • Weather (Ethiopian)
  • Weather (Local)
  • My parking space (still available)
  • Our budding friendship (nine months now)
  • How nice I look today (thanks for noticing)
  • Coffee (Ethiopian)

I waved again and drove to my space. I reached over to grab my purse (gray, shirred, very cute) and realized in horror that my right breast was exposed.

I could die right now.

I have tiny boobs. Bras are optional. Today I should have opted for one.

I imagine that Abdul El-Hajj Muhammad Muhammad went back in his booth and said, "I have been saving that nice lady a space for nine months and finally she thanks me."

I wonder what size cup I'd have to have to get a covered space.

Mist 1


27 Comments:

At 4:17 AM, Blogger Jenna said...

Lol! Isn't it great to have boobs? You probably made that guy's day.

 
At 4:33 AM, Blogger Irish Church Lady :) said...

First! (Maybe)

Oh how nice. You made his day! Did you get free parking for it? Then it was worth it, what's a little humiliation between generous friends?

Happy Friday!

 
At 6:38 AM, Blogger The Naked Nerd said...

I bet he'll be thanking Allah tonite! :P Have a great weekend.

 
At 6:41 AM, Blogger mist1 said...

jenna,

I thought my personality made his day. I don't want to overestimate the power of A cups.

icl,

Of course I parked for free. Humiliation...it's like second nature to me.

 
At 10:37 AM, Blogger mist1 said...

nerd,

In some religions, the right boob is sacred.

 
At 11:15 AM, Anonymous Veronica said...

Ack, I thought that stuff only happened to me. At least you get free stuff out of it.

 
At 12:11 PM, Blogger The Naked Nerd said...

Lord know's it is in mine. :P

 
At 4:19 PM, Blogger Irish Church Lady :) said...

Dang it. Didn't make first but I'll keep trying. Interesting that Jenna and I both said the same thing about making his day.

Have a gweat weekend!

 
At 6:42 PM, Blogger anastasia said...

Boobs are a powerful tool for us ladies. I don't think size is a big issue, as long as you don't have a rack that looks like cow utters!! Or really big ones that are just sloppy and pointing south. Have a great weekend!! I say, "Use what the good Lord gave ya!!"

 
At 6:44 PM, Blogger mist1 said...

veronica,

Nudity loves company.

I should do PR for a nudist colony.

nerd,

I thought I recognized you from Our Lady of Erect Nipples. You sing in the choir, right?

 
At 7:55 PM, Blogger SabilaK said...

Wonder if this makes Abdul El-Hajj Muhammad Muhammad the Justin Timberlake to your Janet Jackson?

 
At 1:13 AM, Blogger mist1 said...

icl,

Keep trying, comment moderation is killing me...but one psycho can ruin it for everyone.

anastasia,

Amen. Slutting out my A's for a parking space!

sabilak,

This is my real nose. My brother is an alien.

 
At 8:43 AM, Blogger Curmudgeonly Yours said...

Thanks for keeping us abreast of your life...

...returns to lurk mode...

 
At 9:05 AM, Blogger mist1 said...

curm,

Well played.

 
At 10:39 AM, Anonymous Paul said...

Did he mention the "Lion of Judah" or Bob Marley ? :)

 
At 10:58 AM, Blogger mist1 said...

paul,

No, but as I left the parking lot yesterday he did say, "Coffee. Tomorrow."

It was sort of like being asked out by Tarzan.

 
At 12:49 PM, Blogger Echo Mouse said...

LOLOL Too good.

I used to have little boobs too. LOVED them. Then I got sick, gained some weight, and all of a sudden have these huge things which I cannot stand. Honestly, how do women with boobs bigger than A manage? I can't stand the things.

Thankfully, I've dropped some weight and now my boobs are slowly returning to normal As. I am nearly counting the days to small heaven!!!

See the power you have? All those women getting implants are entirely missing the point. Erm...

 
At 5:09 PM, Blogger Painter Beach Girl said...

AMEN!!!!! I wore something without a bra last night to see my man, a cute top that required no bra in fact, and I was dropping my kids off with the exhusband who says to me (looking at my breasts) "Did your breasts get smaller?" A--hole, eh? Ooooh, I feel a blog entry coming on

 
At 9:59 AM, Blogger mist1 said...

mouse,

I feel so empowered. I will now proudly refer to the girls as the A-Team.

pbg,

Jealousy does not flatter him. Can't wait to see the entry.

 
At 6:22 AM, Anonymous Veronica said...

Today I wore a pink skirt and black underwear. It wasn't until right after I got home from re-negotiating my contract with my boss that I noticed that the skirt was a bit see through. Unfortunately, this didn't really help me get what I wanted.

 
At 6:53 AM, Blogger mist1 said...

veronica,

Is this the same innocent looking pink skirt? Perhaps your messsages were too mixed. Next time, you might consider slutting yourself up a bit more.

 
At 12:46 PM, Blogger speckledpup said...

nice. very nice.
I'm a DD betcha I could get a covered space...however, I could talk about coffee all day...
hmmmmm

 
At 12:49 PM, Blogger mist1 said...

pup,

I bet you'd get valet parking. Hell, for DDs they might even send a driver to take you to and from work.

 
At 3:48 PM, Anonymous Veronica said...

It was, indeed, the same skirt. I think you're right about my mixed messages.

 
At 4:21 PM, Blogger mist1 said...

veronica,

Mixed messsages are best when they are strategically planned. Use with care.

 
At 12:21 PM, Blogger Darlene said...

Okay, this clearly is the funniest post I have ever read. LOL Heck, if you you were up a cup size, he'd probably become your personal chauffeur...It would be kinda like "Driving Miss Daisy"

 
At 5:56 PM, Blogger mist1 said...

darlene,

Thanks. My moments of humiliation are here for your enjoyment.

 

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