No Way Out
It was like being in a movie. Only without the all-star cast.
I walked out of my therapist's office and greeted the child (crazier than me, based on appearance alone)and his dad waiting in the lobby. The fact that my therapists sees children is something that I am trying very hard not to think about. Although it does explain all the crayon drawings taped to her walls.
I thanked her and headed to the elevators. I pushed the down button and made a phone call. Ten minutes later, the elevator had not come. I decided to take the stairs. I walked down four flights of stairs and encountered an Emergency Exit Only Alarm Will Sound if Door is Opened sign. And a large, looming camera.
I walked back up to the second floor and headed to the elevators. I pushed the button and made a phone call. Five minutes later, the elevator had not come. I walked to the south exit and went down two flights of stairs and encountered an Emergency Exit Only Alarm Will Sound if Door is Opened sign. And a large, looming camera.
I am stuck in the building.
Third floor. Elevators do not respond. Fifth floor, same story. Trying not to panic. Deep breathing. Talking to my inner child to calm her down.
This is not a crisis, I remind myself. If I freak out, I can always go back to my therapist's office and curl up in fetal position outside of her door. She will understand.
I make a phone call. "Just go back to her office," S says. "I can't," I tell her "the kid up there looks really crazy. I would hate to interrupt. He really needs the full hour."
I run up and down the stairs. North exit. South exit. Third floor. Sixth floor. I am not going to freak out just because I am locked in a building. Then I see the strange man hiding in the corner of the stairwell. Okay, it's a pipe. Not a killer. I laugh at myself. I sound a little like a hyena.
I go back to her office where the kid's dad is in the hallway talking on the phone. I blurt out, "I can't get out of the building." I realize then that I am sweaty from the stairs and slightly hysterical.
He points me in the direction of the elevators (genius). I explain that the elevators won't come. Have I pushed the button? Of f*cking course I've pushed the f*cking button you f*cking moron. He tells me that they always exit the building via the elevators and shrugs. He returns to his phone call, "sorry about that..."
As if I'm the idiot. Okay, so I still can't figure out how to exit the building. But I'm no idiot.
I hear a noise on the fifth floor. I run up the stairs and open a door. The janitor is in the closet muttering to himself. He looks a little homicidal. But I am desparate. "The elevators..." I say. "They don't work," he says.
He walks me down to the emergency exit doors and opens them. No alarm. I am an idiot.
I hope the large, looming cameras had a good angle of the look on the face of the dad trapped in the stairwell with the lunatic kid when he realized that they were trapped in the building.