I love group therapy.
I hadn't been to group in a long time. Too long. I was starting to miss it.
Every session, I would imagine that I was a guest on a talk show. Group therapy is much like a talk show. There is a host and corporate pharmaceutical sponsorship that makes it all possible. Really, the biggest difference is that there is never a musical guest.
Sometimes, I was the person in need of tough love. Other times, I felt like an expert panelist. Mostly, I wanted to be the host. Without the credentials, of course.
I like the check-in part where you get to list off all your sins since the last meeting. I liked knowing that other people had done worse things than I had done. It was refreshing to hear the guilt of others over seemingly mundane stuff like obsessively plucking out a patch of hair.
Group therapy is a setting in which it is entirely acceptable to be on and talk about drugs. Half the group will be nodding out from a new prescription. The other half will be twitching like crickets on crack. We compare notes and talk about our personal preferences. Does it make you suicidal? Did you gain weight? How's the sex? Can you drink on it? How long does it take to wear off? It's really the only place outside of college where you can talk about drugs and sex so openly with the advantage of being able to say things about strange habits like flossing several times a day.
Recently, I went back to group. I felt like a past celebrity guest who came back for an update. I told them about life on the other side of group. I confessed that I still have thoughts and behaviors that make me uncomfortable, but that I am learning to set boundaries and I don't see those little bugs at all anymore. I asked them to hold their questions until the Q & A period generously provided at the end of the meeting. I also informed them that I would be available for autographs later. I plugged my blog and told them about what it's like to work with my therapist. She is brilliant, really. She has such a command over her craft. Seriously, she is never out of character throughout our entire session. I feel so honored to have had the opportunity (read: insurance) work with her.
I can't wait to go back. I've got this really convincing way of scratching a hole in the skin on my left arm.