Why I Drink Vodka and Wear Pants (Sometimes)
I am more of a tea drinker than a coffee drinker. There is something about coffee that makes the buzzing in my head louder than normal. Shortly after I drink a cup of coffee, I need a glass of red wine just to balance things out.
I am also more of a local, independent, shade-grown coffee shop kind of girl than a big chain coffee shop kind of girl. Mostly because I dislike paying for the internet. I dislike paying for all kinds of things including parking, drinks, dinner, cable, and oil changes. I go to great lengths to avoid paying for stuff like this because they seem to be intangibles to me. I mean, after dinner, I will only be hungry again and after drinks eventually, I will sober up. What's the use in paying for stuff that I think should be free?
Sometimes, I have to have an iced soy green tea latte. Because I am a lovely person, every time I am in a coffee shop, I call a friend and ask if I can bring them a beverage. I try my best to listen to the order. I swear, I listen. But, I always f*ck it up. Once, I get to the counter, I can't remember if it's skim milk or sugar-free or hazelnut. I just hope that they won't notice when I get there with the wrong drink.
Yesterday, I ordered two beverages and decided to browse all the coffee accessories on display. I love accessories. The coffee grinders were an additional 20% off. I already own a coffee grinder, but is is shiny and not a matte steel finish like the one on the shelf. I knelt down to examine it more closely.
I heard the barista call out, "Grande Soy Chai Latte! Tall Caramel Macchiato!" and stood up to fetch my drinks. I think this is a good place to mention that I was wearing a pair of adorable brown eyelet peep toe shoes with a wrinkly brown skirt.
I stood up without my skirt, which was pinned to the floor under my heels.
The barista handed me my drinks and a few dollars from the tip jar.