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Here's what I need to do: 1. Get Hobby, 2. Floss. Blogging just gets in the way.
The "1"
The CEO has proposed that I drop the formalities and simply call him "O." He calls me "1." That makes me feel special; like we have this special binary relationship. o1o1o11o1oo111.
I never had a lot of nicknames growing up. With a name like Mist 1 (short for One), who needs a nickname?
Dad (who wanted to be called "Flash," but had to settle for "o.d.") is the only person who ever had nicknames for me. Unless you count "I don't know what's gotten into you lately" as a nickname. That's what Mom called me.
Dad called me:
- Magumba. I have no idea where that came from. He later had a car with a MN tag, MGA ###. He said that stood for Magumba. That made me feel special at the time, however upon realizing that it was a randomly generated tag by the Dept. of Motor Vehicles, I feel sort of cheated. Will discus further in therapy.
- Huevos Revueltos. Scrambled eggs. And sometimes just Vueltos; short for scrambled.
- Ribs. I've always been bony.
My talent/genius was coming up with nicknames for my friends (as well as the people that I liked a little less). There was "Goose" because I could not resist pinching that a$$. There was "Chicken Wing," because of that deformity (Dear G*d, please forgive me). There was Darkys Night because he was just so damn dark (seriously G*d, I am a community volunteer now, I've changed my ways). "Chief Nine Nail" only had nine toenails. "Buddha" because he had the best...um, belly...yeah, belly. "naeS," the dyslexic. I miss them all.
Once, I was a competitive gymnast. I was A Force To Be Reckoned With. A Contender. A Powerhouse. My teammates called me, "The Mist." It was on my letter jacket. My last name was on the back. One. I felt so smooth back then. There is something about adding "The" to my name that makes me feel really, really cool.
The Mist
"All of this happened, more or less." - Kurt Vonnegut
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Name: Mist1
Location: Dirty South, USA
Yes, it is about me. Thanks for noticing.
123 Valerie Strikes Again
A Day in the Life
A Day in the Wind
Ali Thinks
Allan Thinks
Animal Mind
A View From The Watter's Edge
Avitable
BNR - Blog Name Removed
Briliant Donkey
Burnett's Urban Etiquette
Burt Reynolds' Mustache
c-writing
Cardiac Fantasies
Carnival of the Mundane
Curiosity Killer
Dallas Dysfunction
Dan's Blah Blah Blog
Disgruntled Workforce
DKY Bar and Grill
Exorcise My Devils
Fantasy and Sci-Fi Lovin' Blog
Fresh Air Lover
Guilty With An Explanation
How to go Insane
I Am Woman, See Me Blog!
Intelligent Humor
It's Go Time!
It's No Picknick!
Jester Tunes
Jen (and Andrew)
Just Tug
Karlababble
Ketchup With My Fries, Please
Liner Notes
Little White Liar
Maiden New York
Mayren Abashed
Meloncutter Musings
Mindy Does Minneapolis
Miss Britt
Much Ado about sumthin!
Muffin 53
Pointless Banter
Pointless Drivel
Q's Corner
Random Moments
Roadtrip
Sanity Optional
Single Life As I Know It
Secret Suburban Misfit
Southern Circle of Hell
Studio-Twenty-Three
The Assimilated Negro
The Death of Retail Price
The Dragon: 050376
The Morning Meeting
The Post College Years
The Wonderful World of Nothing Worthwhile
Tiny Voices in My Head
I'm a Lumberjack
Unenjoyment
Diet Plan
Must Not Sleep
Spinach & My Russian Lover
I Prefer to Live Alone
Meat Market
In b.e.d. with a Little Man
My Brother Vinnie
I'm No Dummy
Header image photo by Alison.
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69 Comments:
i need a cool nickname.
christine,
I don't have a lot to go on here. This is like your second comment (not that I'm counting). "The Christine" isn't quite as cool as I had hoped. You will have to reveal a bit more about yourself.
I must rest now.
My dad called me either "Moosehead" or "Mooselips". Really helped with the self-image while growing up.
amber,
I love meese.
Thanks for coming by.
Good lord you and I are alike! I also name everything... including my friends' cars.
But I also seem to collect nicknames. A quick list: TK, T, Goose, Queenie, George, T-Bo, Angel (only Mom), one I won't mention from my brother, and the latest is Tiki (from my new coworkers). Really, I just turn around when anybody says anything. It's easier that way. And I'm self-centered, so I always assume people are talking to me.
Your Name in EBCDIC MIST
Your Name in Hex D4 C9 E2 E3
Your Name in Binary 11010100 11001001 11100010 11100011
Your Name Mist in EBCDIC MIST
Your Name in Binary 11010100 11001001 11100010 11100011
Your Name in HEX D4 C9 E2 E3
Blame it on Amber, she's hyperlinking everything and everybody.
Your name is your totem. I have lots - online name, pole names, nicknames. I don't _think_ I have multiple personality syndrome...
BTW - Gymnastics?! Mate, you would make one kickass pole dancer, trust me. Get yourself to class! I think you've found a job - money is good, men are, um, less good, hours ace for insomniacs! What you waiting for?
GP
nerd,
What's crude about sh*tmouth? I mean, what are you supposed to call him? Mr. Get-Some-Scope-and-Don't-Forget-To-Floss?
wg,
You know Goose?
Also, I love being self-centered. It works for me.
viragosilverado,
I have always wondered. How'd you get so good with languages?
Thanks for coming by.
puss,
You mean, I may have a future? This blog will really pick up then.
Expect to hear from a lawyer from DC Comics about your copyright violations with the use of the term "The Mist" later today. I didn't want to alert them, but I had no choice. It's for your own good.
My crack research team came up with the following definitions for "magumba":
A Cheesy Eggy Dish
An indigenous esoteric art form in Bermuda
A Kenyan Province
So I'm assuming that if you're creating art while eating cheesy eggs in Africa, you're all set.
Or something.
We all have a future... well, until we boil to death due to greenhouse gas emissions. Out of interest, what is the whole US love affair with cars all about? I got called weird cos I wanted to walk in Los Angeles, and when I wanted to take the bus, everyone thought I was an illegal immigrant - made fifty bucks packing orange crates though - result!
GP
I used to have lots of nicknames. Frog in middle school, Flower in high school (short for flower child). Dame Karma the Foxy in college. Oh, and of course Naked Girl. I need a new nickname.
av,
They'll never take me alive.
nwjr,
Dad has some explaining to do. What's with his infatuation with eggs?
puss,
No one walks in LA? Let me see your Greencard.
I like ribs. The nick name and the dish.
karma,
Your nicknames reveal a progression in your life.
orhan,
I am a dish. Thanks for noticing.
I hear you. The Slut does have a certain panache. At least that's what my friends tell me.
Nicknames are cool but not those cheesy shortening of names using a 'z'. Like Shazza, Bazza, Gazza - 'gag'gag'gag'. Or like Lauren becoming Laaaa..'gag'gag'gag'. I've had numerous names like freak, dork, strange lady, psycho...ahh such cool buddy names!
drib,
Just a little walk down Nostalgia Lane. "Bird by God" should be the title of your next book.
maiden,
They call you that too?
spoon,
Z's are so passe. Fo' shizzle.
Just like The Fonz! Very cool.
How about 'The Rib'...you'd be right up there with Adam, or was it Eve???
I always had bad nicknames; when I was a kid, all the other kids called me "Rail Rhodes". My last name was Rhodes and I had braces. Bah! "When's the train comin' round the track, rail Rhodes?" Stipid kids. :P
Kristyn
Gosh, all I ever got called was "Ali." And "Loulou" by my older brother.
I feel so deprived.
Gosh, all I ever got called was "Ali." And "Loulou" by my older brother.
I feel so deprived.
ooh ooh - make me one!!!!
kare,
The Fonz and I have much in common. We both love tight jeans.
meg,
I am afraid that The Rib is just too catchy. What if I get fat and can't shake the nickname? I'm not into irony.
kristyn,
There is only one thing to do to get back at stupid kids; be ridiculously hot at class reunions.
britt,
Well, for a couple of days when you were MIA, you could have been The Missed One. But that's already taken. Sorry, beat you to it.
Er, greencard? Is that like a Gold Card but in dollars?
GP
1
Ahem, let me say this about that. First, there's The Mist(y) 1, but that opens the door for Sam, and his piano. And I don't smoke. Second, and I am speaking numerically here, you have a book written about you and your unique properties. That's right. there's an 800 page book on the number "1". For example, "you" The Mist 1, when you are just the "1" are The Identity Function. When anything is multiplied against you, you return their true identity.(Bring up the patriotic music here, please) You are Kryptonite to terroritsts and sploogers and ne'erdo wells trying to spoof their way through the internet while you are on guard. Well done 1. This is why you can lounge on my couch unkempt, because you stand guard all night keep us free. It is a debt of gratitude we all owe you.
Who's going to keep the database when she takes this on the world tour?
puss,
The best credit cards are the ones without my name on them.
0,
I hope your book is better than my unauthorized autobiography.
I have been called many things: dirty, Dust, Dusty, Pudding, hey you, and various other things that I cant mention here. I find it's all too much to keep up with so I have nickname that is a "one size fits all" nickname. B*tch. It works for everyone. You should try it.
I have been called many things: dirty, Dust, Dusty, Pudding, hey you, and various other things that I cant mention here. I find it's all too much to keep up with so I have nickname that is a "one size fits all" nickname. B*tch. It works for everyone. You should try it.
dallas,
Great idea. I hate it when I can't remember names. This way, I'll never have another embarassing moment. "Hey B*tch, haven't seen you since So & So's party. How the heck are ya?"
My parents never gave me a nickname - they both came from huge families so when they were addressing me, they always went thru all the names of their siblings before they got to my name..However, I do call my husband, "Hot Stuff", and he calls me "Chester"..Kinda embarasses the kids, but that's my job.
Yo, calling dude naeS is just wrong! Hilarious, but still wrong.
darlene,
Mom calls me by her sister's name when I'm annoying her. She has even called me by the cat's name.
cheet,
It was okay. He's dyslexic. It probably sounded right to him.
UPDATE: nwjr's comment promped me to send Dad an email and get his story on the Magumba name. Here's Dad's reply:
"I always felt like I made it up, but I probably saw it in a 50's movie
trailer. Cheesy egg magumba is a much better name than the
description of the dish. We should invent our own cheesy egg magumba,
which one would eat with juevos revueltos. I didn't make that up
either.. Love, daaaaaaad."
Well, that explains everything. Thanks, Dad.
The Mist,
You're...
The One
The Shit
Love,
The jali
the jali,
That's my new mantra. I have forgotten my old one.
I don't want to Pist1 you off, but the CEO sounds like a real Zero.
:)
My nickname in college was Pope Jeju (a soft "g" sound), which morphed into Stashu Peeshu when I had pot.
NOOOOO....Don't put THE in front of mist......reminds me too much of The Donald!!!! ptooey and yuck!
(yeah, like you'll listen to someone named Odat!!!)
Peace
matt,
Discrete. Real discrete. Do you own a "Pass the Dutch" t-shirt?
odat,
After what I did to my hair last night, The Donald and The Mist have much in common.
I have had many nicknames - the most hurtful of my childhood was Stinkbomb, apparently I had a predisposition for flatulence. In my adult career I've been called Puddin' and Princess. Apparently I'm self centered like WanderingGirl. That is why I chose my own blog nickname, even if it is based in truth.
I love nicknames...I love giving them out...A friend of mine and I in college used to give nicknames to all the people in our class...based on various things...Some include:
Scoot Mouse
S.S. Comb
Sucker Teeth
Cross
NAP
The list goes on...
icl,
Nobody calls me Puddin'. Although, I am rather fond of tapioca.
nihilistic,
I like your friend. What was your nickname? I couldn't help but notice that you didn't mention...
One of my nicknames centered on my hands - my mom called them fart hands because my touch is so light and soft. The other rather embarrassing because as a baby I had many bowel movements, my mom called me shitter. But since our primary language is Spanish the word for it was less revolting than it sounds in English.
c,
Everything sounds better in Spanish.
Everyone should have spanish nicknames...los huevos!
www.bionicbuddha.com
Ah Matt, better a real 0 than an artificial one.
buddha,
Como se dice "Bionic Buddha" en espanol?
Thanks for coming by.
0,
Down boy.
1
Why The Mist and not The Wind or The Grace or The Great Gymnast in a Letter Jacket First Edition? There must be some insight here.
My nickname was Bob...as her nickname is also Bob...it has a long tedious story behind it...
0,
The Wind leaves the door wide open for a lot of teasing. Sometimes, I pass The Wind.
The Grace just isn't true.
The Great, well there were better.
I am simply The Missed One.
nihilistic,
Hey, I have a B.O.B. in my life too.
nihilist, Sir
You may be a Bob, but She is a Bob Bob where each Bob carries a spare 'o'. Makes telling you apart in the dark a snap.
Nothing personal, you understand, but it's a phermone thing. Heady stuff. So, to me, she became The "1", totally unambigous.
sigh.
0,
B.O.B. is my Battery Operated Boyfriend.
1
B.O.O.B. is boob! Upon inspection, there is braille located on the rim around the nipple that when translated says, "suck here".
You have two. Which do you prefer be worshiped first? I just hate ambiguity.
0,
I think EOE laws require that you worship both the right and the left.
1
Dear Mist-ress, thank you for thise bounty you have laid before me........
.......................amen
0,
When did we start talking about booty? The last I knew, we were talking about booby.
1
booby! As in booylicious?! knit one perl two boobies boobies woo hoo!
Just a little spontaneous appreciation
0,
Spontaeous appreciation is good. Premature appreciation is bad.
1
we got timin'
a tic a tic a tic a tic a timin'
timin' timin' timin' timin' timin'
timin' is the thing, to do
it's timing for me
n you
Here it comes, another true confession.
You make me sing.
0,
If I could only make you clean. My desk is a mess.
0,
And the crisper drawer in the fridge is repulsive. If you could tackle that when you've finished with my desk.
Thanks.
1
You need a wife, leave the crisper drawer to me.
true confessions: I am laughing my ass off
0,
My mom hired a wife once. When she walked out on her, Dad had a good chuckle.
im extreamly short for my age 13
i have forest green eyes
mouth filled with braces
and i am a GYMNAST
anon,
Sounds just like me...a long, long time ago.
The Mist reminds me of a Stephen King short story...google it. New nightmare fodder for you...:)
twila,
Now that you mention it, I think I have read it. Back when I used to read. Before blogging.
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