I love shopping in adult novelty stores. I have so many questions. I always ask for help. I try not to ask the creepy guy with his hand in his pocket that is usually standing next to me.
I also like to give unsolicited testimonials. I told the guys looking at stretchy rubber cockrings that while they were a lot of fun, they should use caution to not fall asleep with one on. I told them that I know from first hand experience. They looked at me strangely. I explained, "well not first hand, but I was there. Just trust me on this one. You want to remember to take it off." They tried to ignore me, so I continued. I gave them details about what it would look like in the morning in the event that they forgot about it. When one guy's face went pale, I told him that it was exactly the same color his penis would be in the morning if he slept with it on. They didn't thank me for my expert product review, but I understand. Some people have hang-ups about stuff like that.
Last night, I found a new item. The Vibrating Panty. I am sure that this invention has been around for a while, but it was on the top shelf. The one that I cannot reach. So, I have lived all this time without a single pair of vibrating panties. I have wasted so much time.
I went to the cashier and politely asked, "excuse me, could you get those panties down for me?" They were a pretty teal and had a butterfly on them. When I clarified my request she pulled them back up and got another girl to get a pair of vibrating panties off the shelf for me.
According to the package, they are very discrete. There is no tell-tale buzzing noise. You can wear them anywhere (except in water or thunderstorms). The higher end model had a wireless remote control (battery included). The panties required only two AA batteries for the inconspicuous battery pack.
"Where do you put the battery pack so that it's inconspicuous?" I asked.
The sales associate responded with a gesture. No words were necessary.
I bought a pair. The package says "one size fits all." I'll be the judge of that.